Dr. Oz 3 Day Smoothie Detox Day 1 Recap

I have finished the Dr. Oz 3 day smoothie detox that you might've seen online.  I originally saw it on pinterest or facebook about a month and a half ago and had been wanting to try it but kept making excuses.  I finally buckled down this week and decided I was just going to go for it, no excuses.  On Wednesday afternoon, I went and bought all the stuff and it was kinda pricey, but worth it, I figured.  After the fact, I was looking at his website and the cost estimate is $16 a day.  I have no idea how anyone would be able to purchase all the food and the supplements and epsom salt and lavender oil for $48.  I spent about $75 and already had some of the items.  I also discovered (later) some of the items somewhere else for quite a bit less, so, if you're looking to do this, shop around!  Where I shopped, flax seed couldn't be found for less than $10.  Later, I saw it elsewhere for $4.  Oh, well!  Just a suggestion.  Also, frozen fruit is just as (if not more) nutritious than fresh and quite a lot cheaper.  So, recap of my experience:

DAY 1:

mood:  stupidly optimistic (eagerly awaiting the end and how AWESOME I thought I was going to feel when it was over)
weight: (yeah, I'm gonna put this-honestly) 170.2 (I gained quite a lot over the holidays) (I wasn't doing this to lose weight, but I wasn't too sad that many people reported a 4-5 pound drop, either)
physical:  been having a lot of sinus headaches, back pain, jaw pain, and abdominal pain (CRAZY bad abdominal pain, to be honest- almost went to the ER late Christmas Eve because it was awful)

Breakfast:  Hot green tea with lemon (yeah, no coffee.  No coffee.  No coffee for Alex.  For 3 days.  No coffee for Alex for 3 days.  Holy crap).  Smoothie/shake consists of raspberries, a banana, almond butter, water, flax seed, lemon, and spinach.
I made it up at about 730, before we all left the house for the day, and sipped it all morning (it made a HUGE cupful).  I had read online that people who did this already thought the breakfast smoothie was great.  It wasn't.  It was wicked tart and the consistency was kinda gross.  Oh, well.  It wasn't the worst thing I've ever had.  I got to work at 9, we were overstaffed and I was given the day off.  I struggled to decide whether to go since I have an extra day off anyway now but THANK GOODNESS I decided to.  (You'll see why soon)
Returned home and took the recycling in.  Made the lunch shake.  Took some old kids stuff to the consignment shop.

Lunch:  Smoothie consists of celery, cucumbers, kale, apple, lime, coconut oil, almond milk, and pineapple.  I DETEST CELERY AND CUCUMBERS.  I had read several online reviews the night before and EVERYONE hated the lunch smoothie so I was dreading it.  I took the advice of several people and used less celery than the recipe calls for.  It still made an absurd amount of smoothie.  To my surprise, day 1 lunch smoothie tasted great to me.  I could hardly taste the celery and cucs (halleluja)!  At this point, I was still stupidly jazzed about the whole process and figured I could make smoothies pretty much one after the other and never get hungry cuz I'd be sipping all day.  I also entertained the idea of making an extra snack smoothie (the plan calls for one afternoon snack of whatever your favorite smoothie is), since I generally eat a LOT, and also am pretty active.  By the time I returned home from the kids consignment store, I WANTED to clean the house and do something productive since I had taken the day off, but I had NO energy at this point.  I also started to get a RAGING headache, and my mood was EXTREMELY CRABBY.  I had to tell my husband that I couldn't text him for a while because I was so irritable.  I didn't finish the smoothie until about 2 (I made it around 1045).  It was fine.

Snack:  I was eager to try the dinner smoothie and had heard it was good so I decided to make this one for my snack.  This one has coconut water, blueberries, mango, avocado, kale, flax seed, and cayenne pepper.  I thought for sure the sweet and spicy would be savory and DELICIOUS and that the mango and avocado would make it creamy and great.  WRONG!  This smoothie was INSANELY spicy, first of all.  Secondly, with so much liquid, the consistency was like liquid with lil chunks of food floating in it.  Ick.  I choked down a few sips and couldn't hang.  I put it away for later and we went to karate, where we had graduation.  In retrospect, starting this on a day when I (was supposed to) work, and we had something going on, was kinda TOTALLY frickin' stupid.  If you do this, START ON YOUR DAY OFF, preferably when you won't have to make contact with ANYONE!  I was a crabby monster by this point and struggling like crazy not to take it out on Ryan or the kids.  Still had NO energy, was slightly lightheaded, and my headache was HORRENDOUS.  I was also stiff and achy so sitting on the ground at graduation watching all the other belts do their thing was really hard.  By the time it was time to perform my form, I could barely get up, almost knocked some little kid down trying to run across the mats to the other side, and forgot my form midway through (thank goodness it was just for a sec). 

Dinner:  Still had to finish off my "snack" smoothie and by this point, I felt AWFUL.  I had no energy, had a headache, was crabby, and felt like I was going to puke.  My body also hurt like crazy.  I choked down a few more sips of the smoothie but the thought of drinking more food was killing me and I was ready to give up.  I was having some major regrets and also some moments of laughing at myself for thinking that this sounded like something that was manageable to do.  The smoothies WEREN'T that good, drinking all your food SUCKS, having no coffee for 3 days SUCKS, 3 days is a LOT longer than I thought, initially, and detoxing your body is a PROCESS which HURTS.  Seriously, much of the process was downright painful.

Detox bath:  The regimen calls for an epsom salt and lavender oil detox bath each night.  I was so tired and crappy feeling the first day that I almost skipped it.  I was glad I didn't.  I initially thought I would read in the tub, but I was so tired I just decided to relax and ended up falling asleep for a bit.  I got out after close to an hour and then took a quick shower and actually felt a little better, but still had a headache.  I was shocked that I wasn't hungry, but I really had no appetite.  This day had been incredibly trying and I was becoming obsessed with researching how other people had fared during their experience doing it. 

End of day one:  felt bloated, miserable, tired, lightheaded, achy (like that general mild body ache you get when the flu is coming on but is not quite in full force yet), and was SERIOUSLY doubting my ability to stick it out for 2 more days.  I was tempted to just give up but decided to keep trying.  This plan is NOT the breezy detox reset I thought it was going to be!